Has something changed in my relationships leading me to feel more disconnected? Have I been nurturing my current connections and creating opportunities for new ones that make me feel 'seen'? Am I intentionally or accidentally isolating ?" However, if I'm feeling lonely more frequently than usual, I get curious about the shift. "Most people feel lonely from time to time, especially in today's individualistic, independence-valuing, more-single-than-ever-culture. "It's important to differentiate between situational loneliness and chronic loneliness," says Bruneau. Ask yourself what loneliness looks like for you. Recognize that loneliness looks different for people at different times of their lives, and that there are those who have many relationships, but still feel like something is missing. When people expand their definitions of affection and love to include a wider range of behaviors, they often discover that they aren't as deprived as they originally thought."īorchee // Getty Images Reflect on your feelings of loneliness. "I might notice that my friends don't tell me they love me, or don't 'like' my social media posts, but I overlook the fact that they always volunteer to help when I have a home project to do. "Many of us get tunnel vision when it comes to affection and intimacy, in that we 'count' only certain behaviors while discounting others," says Professor Floyd. Sometimes when we are feeling lonely, we can't see what's right in front of us. "Loneliness is a healthy emotion, revealing places we yearn for connection." Take stock of connections you already have.
#DONT HUG ME IM SCARED SCARY HOW TO#
" I remind myself just how pervasive loneliness is and I imagine being connected to 'all of the lonely people out there.' Sometimes I listen to "Eleanor Rigby" to hammer that point home," says Megan Bruneau, therapist, executive coach and author of How to Be Alone (And Together). If you're feeling isolated, you're sharing the experience with millions of other people. Denying our loneliness only perpetuates it, so before we can recover, we have to be honest - at least with ourselves - about what we are experiencing." Recognize that you are not alone in feeling lonely. "That stigma encourages us to avoid admitting when we're lonely. "We tend to stigmatize loneliness in the U.S., equating it with being a loner or a loser," says Kory Floyd, Professor of Communication and Psychology at the University of Arizona. But expressing that feeling can be the beginning of releasing it. Telling other people - or even admitting to yourself - that you're lonely can feel scary, shameful and self-defeating. If you're wondering what to do when feeling lonely, here's what therapists, doctors and researchers say are some of the best strategies to cope with loneliness: Acknowledge and validate your feelings of loneliness. Turns out, connectedness with other people is vital for our own survival. Doctors have also found that people who are lonely tend to have increased blood pressure, weaker immune systems and more inflammation throughout the body. Furthermore, loneliness is closely linked with overall mental health: Adults with mental health issues are more than twice as likely to feel lonely and experience side effects as those with strong mental health.
In fact, a 2021 study conducted by health insurer Cigna found that more than half of American adults - approximately 58% - are considered lonely by clinical standards. is currently experiencing a "loneliness epidemic" - particularly in the midst of social isolation experienced during the prolonged COVID-19 pandemic. Friends, family and strangers who live miles apart can communicate instantly, thanks to the power of social media and the internet.
You could say the world is more connected than it's ever been before.
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